Kraft Confirms Velveeta Shortage as Super Bowl Approaches (The Horror!)

2D11086829-shotofvelveeta.blocks_desktop_largeRemember that time Starbucks ran out of pumpkin-flavored syrup at the height of autumnal mania, and all hell broke loose? Well, imagine a similar scenario, except instead of coffee-seeking young professionals and hipsters, the angry mob in desperate search for seasonal foodstuffs is a rowdy group of football fans. With a just-confirmed shortage of Velveeta right before the Super Bowl, this doomsday situation could be looming in our imminent future.

At first, like all rumors of impending catastrophe (global warming, anyone?), the general public assumed it was some sort of media-hyped panic or marketing ploy. But, oh, how tragically wrong we were.

Earlier this fall, Kraft sent NBC News two different memos warning that customers should be prepared for limited supplies of Velveeta in the coming months. “We have recently moved our Velveeta production lines from one Plant to another Plant this summer,” read one. “During this transition we have run into production challenges.”

Just a way for the company to get people to run out and stock up on over-processed “cheese product,” right? Wrong!

Kraft has now officially confirmed that the predicted shortage is beginning to take effect. “We informed our retail customers a few months ago about the supply challenges and we’ve been working hard to adjust distribution accordingly,” said Kraft spokeswoman Jody Moore. In other words: “We told you so!”

But, there is a ray of hope in the darkness; it is in fact possible to make queso dip at home, with, you know, actual cheese. Here’s a recipe. Plus, as Jon Stewart points out in the below video, this isn’t the first time a shortage of Superbowl-related products has plagued the country before the big game, and if we’ve survived before, God willing, we can do it again!

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