UPN to Emmy voters: We have a good show! We swear!

What does it say about your network when you have to compare your best show to a missing child to try and get a little love?

Variety reported today that CBS Paramount TV is sending all 12,000 Emmy voters DVDs of the complete season of “Everybody Hates Chris,” which airs on UPN, in a box that resembles a milk carton with a “Have you seen Chris?” ad on the side. (CBS Paramount produces “Chris” for its sister company UPN)

On the one hand, it’s nice to see the little network that couldn’t (thus its pending merger with the WB) promoting its one quality scripted show — a show that is, for our money, the best sitcom on TV since “Arrested Development” finally expired.

Showtime is the only other network that has sent entire seasons of its show on DVD, but at least they have the excuse that they’re a pay network and the only people who would have caught “Huff” or “Weeds” are lesbians and very forgiving friends of Kirstie Alley.

But despite the fact that it airs against “Will & Grace” and “That ’70s Show” — two series that make Sumner Redstone look young and vital — UPN apparently can’t get people to tune into “Chris” without fearing they’ll accidentally catch a glimpse of “Shasta McNasty” or “Homeboys in Outer Space.”