Under 35? Kiplinger Wants You to Forget LA and Move to…Lansing?

Online top-10 lists are almost always eyeball-baiting shitshows, not worthy of our attention. But we need to say a few things about a recent Kiplinger piece that’s currently boggling our mind. It’s a list of the top-10 places for people under 35 to live in America–a list that doesn’t include LA, but somehow puts Lansing, Michigan right next to New York City.
Here’s why all you youngsters out there should apparently jump ship to Lansing:

Cheap rent well below the national average, a respectable bar and club scene, high-paying job opportunities in bio and Internet technologies. Average commute is only 20 minutes.

Let’s see…cheap rent, short commutes, depressing post-industrial wasteland…or perennially warm weather and the chance to have coke-fueled sex with a hipster model or two in the bathroom of the Edendale Grill…Hmmm…Tough call.

We asked copy editor extraordinaire, Slake man-about-town and Lansing native Craig Gaines his thoughts:

I can’t hate on Lansing. While I’m certainly quite happy making L.A. my home, I think the good folks at Kiplinger’s make a few good points. Midsize Rust Belt towns like Lansing can actually offer young professionals a lot of opportunities, because they’re so wide open. Trying to make it out in L.A. really isn’t all that original–it’s just that the food, weather, and women are better. But a smart, motivated Young Turk with access to a good winter jacket could easily do the big-fish-small-pond thing in a place like the Capital City–there’s virtually no one standing in your way.

We suspect Gaines is being a little easy on his hometown. This Fishie has been to Lansing, and knows for a fact that anyone in that city would pretty much kill just for a whiff of the organically shampooed hair of just about any waitress in Los Angeles.
We’re staying put, thank you very much Kiplinger.
Photo: Lovely downtown Lansing, your new home.