Having a Shitty Morning?

Not as bad as my co-editor, Matt Dornic, who thought he was getting a “lucky” parking spot under a tree. He returned moments later to a world of shit. “They looked me in the eye and I knew it was war,” Dornic said of the guilty birds. “I had to strategically dodge their droppings just to open the door. Good thing I wasn’t driving the convertible today.”