Featured in Features: Boob Edition

A look at what’s happening in your feature stories…

The irresistibleThe Daily Caller‘s imitable Taylor Bigler has a writeup on Italian magazine Chi running topless photos of Kate Middleton after its sister publication was sued for doing the same thing. Accompanying Bigler’s story is the cover of Chi featuring the nude photos, but with a slight adjustment: Covering vital areas of Middleton’s boobs is a superimposed photo of Editor-in-Chief Tucker Carlson’s face.

The ironic— Middleton can’t seem to catch a break. She’s in the middle of a lawsuit involving her breasts and when she and Prince William left the Western world for the Solomon Islands yesterday, she’s faced with more boobs. Gordon Rayner for the Telegraph writes, “over the course of the day dozens more topless dancers and welcoming committees were placed in the couple’s path.” Perhaps even worse, the royal couple were briefly confronted by local warriors: “[A]fter landing on a tiny dirt airstrip in Marau on the southern tip of the main island of Guadalcanal, the Duke and Duchess were challenged by fearsome spear-carrying warriors, in white war paint and whooping aggressively,” the story says. It notes, however, that the warriors “laid down their arms” after the tribe’s chief determined the couple to be “friendly.”

The busted— Journalist Soraya Roberts has a column in Slate about her boobs. Roberts suffers from the worst of problems. You see, she’s thin but has big boobs and that means she has trouble finding the right bra size. “In theory, the United States likes large breasts,” she writes. “In practice, the United Stastes likes large breasts as long as they’re on the right body. That means bigger women have bigger chests, smaller women have smaller chests.” Roberts reveals that she’s a size 28G (“full-busted”) and thus needs a smaller strap with larger cups. “[T]here are only two U.S. bras I could conceivably wear in a pinch,” she says. “California brands Parfait by Affinitas, which sells 30-40 D-G sizes in specialty stores and online (I can wear a 30FF if I have to), and Claudette, which also offers 30G bras online and in various boutiques across the country.” Life must be hard (or should we say “firm”?). Fortunately, Roberts doesn’t suffer alone. Her column inspired a full discussion on Reddit. As of now, there are 358 comments.

The titillating— In HuffPost Jill Di Donato gives the people what they want: “The truth about breast orgasms.” Donato writes that while at a cocktail party, a “gorgeous attorney” female friend told her about having an orgasm with only stimulation of her breasts. “I had to confess to her that I wasn’t all that familiar with the breast O,” she writes. “The idea of a woman experiencing an orgasm without any genital stimulation sounded perplexing. But I couldn’t wait to find out more.” Cue porn music. Actually there’s no sex in the column. Just some general advice on how to handle boobs in order to reach orgasm.