First Lady Tampers With Unborn Baby To Keep Husband In ABC’s ‘Scandal’

On ABC’s political drama “Scandal” last night, viewers were treated to a plot that would make even the ice-covered Hillary Clinton say, “Damn, that’s cold.”

Having just suffered a serious head injury from an attempted assassination, the fictional President Fitzgerald Grant is ready to divorce his very pregnant wife Mellie so that he can finally be with his side piece Olivia Pope without feeling guilty. As in real life, this would be political suicide, but Grant is ready to go through with it.

Mellie and Cyrus Beene, Grant’s chief of staff, are both animals in politics who don’t want to lose their places in the White House. So, Beene tells Mellie that if she has “one last trick” up her sleeve to change Grant’s mind, it is the time to use it.

What does Mellie do? With four weeks left in her pregnancy, she walks into the doctor’s office with a smile on her face and has a medically induced labor, apparently without an epidural, as she can be seen at the end of the episode screaming and looking sweatier than former Democratic Rep. David Wu in a costume shop. Grant rushes to Mellie’s side to hold her hand and help her through the process.

Here’s how it would happen in real life…

First, why is Mellie able to come and go from a doctor’s office several times within a week and not a single reporter is there to cover it? Michelle Obama can’t visit a Target, dressed inconspicuously in a baseball cap and sunglasses, without an AP photographer being tipped off showing up unannounced. And yet this first lady is pregnant, taking multiple trips to a doctor and no one’s there to see what’s up?

In real life, FNC’s Greta Van Susteren would be out front of the office, wearing an expertly tailored three-piece suit, waiting for a sight of the First Lady so she could ask, “Everything check out okay? Is it a boy or girl? Do you have a name picked out? Who are the godparents?”