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Whipping boy of anti-corporate crusaders, poster child for the Malling of America, Starbucks could use a hyped-up überfan spokesman like John Winter Smith.

Who better to humanize the end lessly replicating chain than a guy who’s managed to visit three-quarters of its stores—2,850 at last count? Like Subway’s Jared Fogle before him, Smith is on a mission. The 30-year-old Texan computer programmer never could pass up a short with two sugars. In recent years he’s logged 240,000 miles in his ’97 Acura to worship at as many Starbucks altars as possible.

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