Where, oh where, is the Dairy Queen?

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With Ronald McDonald taking star turns on the ice in Turin, the Burger King scoring touchdowns in the NFL and Jack (In The Box) reminiscing about his high-school conquests, don’t we need a physical incarnation of the Dairy Queen to counterbalance all this locker-room jocularity? While many of us may have fantasized about what the Dairy Queen must look like—her creamy complexion, her strong, udder-squeezing hands—we have never had a visual aid akin to Miller High Life’s Girl

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