Ads on Toilet Paper, for Marketing’s Real Bottom Feeders

Are you brave enough to put your brand logo and advertising message right where you customer can, and surely will—let's be frank here—smear it with his own excrement? Jordan and Bryan Silverman trust that you are. The brothers have started a company in Ann Arbor, Mich., called Star Toilet Paper, which specializes in printing ads and coupons on toilet paper. The minimum order is $99 for 20,000 ads, or about half a cent per ad. Ads have been around in urinals for some time, but toilet paper, as a medium, truly is a nether region. "It takes advertisers a couple of seconds to wrap their heads around advertising on toilet paper," Jordan tells the Detroit Free Press. "No one has ever tried to do this." Adds Bryan: "I really did think Jordan was a little crazy at first. But I love working with him." We've seen things like this before, mostly in jest. Modernista! famously printed 30 Rock-themed promo toilet paper once, so you could wipe your butt with Alec Baldwin. But this is no gimmick. The Silvermans say they've signed up 50 local advertisers. "We thought it was hilarious. Everybody uses it. Who doesn't need it?" said Barby Checchi, a manager at tropical-fish store Fish Doctors. Jim Koli, owner of Northside Grill in Ann Arbor, said, evidently with a straight face, "It's just getting rolling. … It was unique, and at a certain level it was absurd enough that it would be interesting to do." If only all clients were so daring. Check out Star's TP's first couple of homemade self-promo spots below. And wash your hands before returning to work.

Man-Butts Gyrate to Sell Women Skin Cream

If there’s one thing that generally doesn’t get much attention—in life or mass marketing—it’s the man-butt. After the male stripper flick Magic Mike opens Friday, that may change.

ChapStick Gets Itself in a Social Media Death Spiral

We're catching up on all the social media scandals today. The major one this week involves ChapStick—a brand whose marketing I don't recall ever making any sort of impact. Until now. Here's the play-by-play. ChapStick posts weird image on Facebook of a woman, backside in the air, looking for her ChapStick behind a couch. Blogger is disgusted, blogs about it. Blogger tries to reply on Facebook too. ChapStick deletes her comments. Others object to the image. ChapStick deletes their comments. ChapStick's ads with the line "Be heard at Facebook.com/ChapStick" start to look foolish. People keep commenting. ChapStick keeps deleting. People get angry. ChapStick gets worried. The image isn't even that big of a deal—it's ChapStick's reaction to the criticism that galls. "What asses," people say of ChapStick (get it?). People start commenting about why they can't see their old comments. ChapStick can't keep up with all the deleting. Comments are getting through, and they're nasty. (People who aren't even fans of the brand can comment nowadays, of course.) ChapStick for some weird reason doesn't just delete the image, apologize, or even acknowledge the issue, beyond its infuriating deleting of comments. ChapStick apparently thinks the whole thing will just go away if it can silence enough of its "fans." Why is ChapStick so stupid? It's not a total mess, though. Burt's Bees and Carmex must be thrilled. Larger image after the jump.      UPDATE: ChapStick has finally responded—deleting the offending post (it's gone from the ChapStick website, too) and adding a new Facebook post with a weird semi-apology. "We see that not everyone likes our new ad, and please know that we certainly didn't mean to offend anyone!" the post says. "Our fans and their voices are at the heart of our new advertising campaign, but we know we don't always get it right. We've removed the image and will share a newer ad with our fans soon!"      But then, there's this very strange second paragraph: "We apologize that fans have felt like their posts are being deleted and while we never intend to pull anyone's comments off our wall, we do comply with Facebook guidelines and remove posts that use foul language, have repetitive messaging, those that are considered spam-like (multiple posts from a person within a short period of time) and are menacing to fans and employees."      So, to those ChapStick fans whose comments were deleted—it was all your fault, you obnoxious, foul-mouthed, menacing spambots! Seriously, maybe just shut down the whole page at this point.      UPDATE: In a phone interview, Ray Kerins, head of global media relations at Pfizer (which owns ChapStick), acknowledged the missteps, but added: "We're committed to listening. We're committed to the dialogue. This is a perfect example of listening to your followers, your fans. We're trying to live by those words."      UPDATE: Trying to lighten the mood, a reader sent in a link to two Chapstick ads from the '70s featuring skier Suzy Chaffee as "Suzy Chapstick." See those spots after the jump, too.

British Ad Completely Filled With Farting Lightbulbs

I know I often rag on commercials for going too long, but this British spot for Megaman low-energy lightbulbs proves there's no way a farting lightbulb gag can overstay its welcome. I particularly appreciate their efforts to match certain types of bulbs to specific fart noises—the pool lights made me choke on my cereal.

Belgrade Is Pro-Butts, Anti-Poop

Serbia's capital may have an abundance of dog poop, but this cheeky series of ads from McCann Erickson Belgrade proves that the town doesn't have a shortage of nice butts. And when residents bend over to clean up said dog droppings, they're helping create a "beautiful city" in more ways than one. Notice, though, that the three lady butts (one below, two more after the jump) are appealing and demure, while the lone male in the series has his underpants riding up and is grabbing an obvious handful of poop. I guess the “girl bodies are sexy, guy bodies are funny” theory isn't limited to the United States. Via Ads of the World.

Beach-Volleyball Stars Rent Out Bikini Backsides to Advertiser

Here are two QR codes that might not get lost in the shuffle.

PETA Gets Even Nakeder With Bonnie-Jill Laflin

Note: The ad below is not safe for work. It took longer than I expected, but PETA has finally outsmuttied American Apparel with this new ad featuring Bonnie-Jill Laflin—a former cheerleader and currently the NBA's only female scout—mooning the camera on behalf of vegetarianism or whatever. Come on now. The link between Ms. Laflin's dietary habits and that airbrushed photo is basically non-existent. You can eat steak every day and still look like that. And where do they go from here, exactly? Pathological chauvinism tends to provoke less outrage than comparing chicken farms to concentration camps. So, they'll have to keep getting more explicit. Is Larry Flynt available? Full ad after the jump.

Levi’s ‘asscam’ sees all you perverts leering

Continuing its rigorous research into women's butts, Levi's (and ad agency Colenso BBDO) hooked up an "asscam" to one Australian lady's backside, and filmed the results. The exposé revealed about […]

New Jersey flustered by giant butt billboard

Gigantic female buttocks, covered in beads, rising high into the sky and blocking out the sun? Sure, we’ve all had such daydreams. Yet such a moon has risen for real […]

Don’t use puns on your proctology billboard

Worst/best billboard ever? No ifs, and or butts about it. Via FAILblog.