Too much information? Try way, way, way too much information.
A press release describing a very hands-on, publicly promiscuous application for the Web, as well as for mobile devices including the iPhone, Droid and Palm Pre, was, well, interesting. Only those who aren’t easily offended should read on, and this definitely qualifies as “not safe for work.”
The product is called FapMapper, and its source, not surprisingly, is a porn studio known as Pink Visual. According to Pink Visual, “fap” is a euphemism for masturbation that is increasingly popular among young, tech-savvy Web users.
If the above map means anything, the theory about there not being anything else to do in the suburbs can be thrown right out the window: Check out the concentration in Manhattan.
Without further ado, highlights (or lowlights, as they may be) from the press release:
At long last, proud masturbators and public-sex-act aficionados have a fully functional utility with which to document their sexual exploits; FapMapper.com (www.fapmapper.com) is out of “mastur-beta” and ready for primetime.
In addition to comments from users, FapMapper now offers revealing statistical data, like the top fapping cities, states and individual users. The map also features icons identifying adult stores where FapMapper users will find Pink Visual titles stocked on the shelves.
At the moment, a user named “Bigbwoy” from Toronto owns the top spot on the Frequent Fapper charts, while California is the top state and San Antonio, Texas, is the city with the most “Fap Pins” placed thus far.
For more information, visit www.fapmapper.com. Warning: you may learn more about your neighbor’s masturbation habits than you ever wanted to know.
Pink Visual brand and product manager Kim Kysar adds in the release:
We’ve had hundreds of users putting the FapMapper through its paces and submitting suggestions for a couple months now, and we’re finally ready to unveil the official Web app. It’s very gratifying to see this important tool for sexual self-expression ready for widespread use at last.
We’ve got couples posting about having sex on camping trips, people just marking places where they spotted a particularly beautiful woman walking down the street, even things that have nothing whatsoever to do with sex or masturbation. That’s just the nature of any social-networking tool; once you release it out into the world, the community develops on its own, and decides for itself what to do with the utility you have provided.
I have to believe that once this thing really gets rolling, you’ll see San Francisco climb the charts from its current position as the fourth-place fapping city. We clearly don’t have the penetration we need in the southern Atlantic coastal states, either; how can Florida, the ancestral home of Spring Break festivities, not even be in the top 10 Fap States? That’s just downright shameful.