The term “white bread” may never quite sound the same. Wonder Bread, maker of the whitest, squishiest, most unnatural bread on the planet (according to this story, the traditional Wonder Bread flour has been stripped of its bran and germ), will now offer its product in a whole-wheat version. It’s a response to mothers concerned that their Dorito-eating children (OK, we’re editorializing) need to eat more nutritious bread; the upside, for Wonder Bread fans, is that the bread will still taste the same, and have the same, uh, texture, as the original, which is of course so spongy that the jelly in a PB&J soaks right through, turning the entire sandwich into a gloppy mess. But let’s not digress. If you’re into the concept so far, you may not be when you hear the product’s name: “White Bread Fans 100% Whole Grain.” Any better suggestions out there?
—Posted by Catharine P. Taylor