Do not laugh at the awful, society-shredding Miracle Whip ads. That's Beverly Willett's plea to America in a piece titled "Take a Stand Against Kraft's Thoughtless Contest" on the National Review's website. She's obviously talking about the Kraft sandwich-spread brand's "Not for Every Relationship" contest, in which couples are invited to submit videos about how Miracle Whip brought them together, or tore them asunder, for a chance at $25,000—which the winners can use to fund their "wedding or divorce." Willett, who just happens to be vice chair of the Coalition for Divorce Reform, will not be submitting a video, and she rebuffs Kraft's claim that the contest is meant to be good-natured. "Try telling the 1 million new children each year who have to shuttle between two homes on alternate weekends that Kraft's 25 G's are all in good fun," she writes. "Tell it to the millions of spouses whose lives have been ripped apart by unilateral divorces, often without cause. How about the mothers thrust into poverty by divorce? Some of them are paying for Kraft macaroni & cheese with food stamps at the supermarket checkout. Are they smiling? How about their daughters, whose odds of teen pregnancy increase with divorce?" Yikes. Sounds like Willett prefers mayo. But she is right about one thing. As you can see below, the contest submissions so far really are unfunny as hell.