Van Damme Recalls His Icy-Cold Pants

Coors Light spot is chilling

This week at, one of the craziest spots of 2011—the Coors Light ad in which Jean Claude Van Damme stands on a snowy mountainside and waxes poetic about how the beer is a lot like … his frozen pants. "My pants froze, and froze hard," says the Muscles from Brussels. "So tight. Even thinking about it takes me back." What on earth is he talking about? Wait, there's more. "Have you ever seen a man-penguin walk after an intense mating season? Have you?" he continues. "When a man's pants freeze as rock solid as mine—let me tell you, my friends, even that was nothing compared to the ice-cold refreshment of a Coors Light. Man, my pants were tight." The year's most lunatic monologue? Quite possibly. Talking about your frozen crotch and comparing yourself to an oversexed penguin—this is what happens when you get older in Hollywood and the action roles go to someone else. Also new at this week: spots for Stihl chainsaws and Seattle's Best Coffee. See them all at