Lose even more weight on the AdFreak diet

Adfreak-diet2

Inspired by Alex Bogusky's The 9-Inch Diet, the editors of this blog are issuing a weight-loss book of our own: The 8-Inch Diet. In in, we suggest serving food on 8-inch plates, to further reduce portions and make you look even more svelte than the big losers using the 9-inch plates. Beyond that, we were stumped for material, so we collected a bunch of Emeril recipes with bran substituted for ingredients like sugar, salt and flour. (It's still more scientifically sound than anything Alex suggests.) Also, our tome is illustrated with stomach-turning artwork from this very blog, such as the anti-chaw guy with half a face, the corpse-like Euro-anorexia gal and the freakishly furry Burt Reynolds. (Stare at Burt for five minutes, and you won't feel like finishing that crème brûlée!) Oh, and if you pile up your 8-inch plate with cinnamon chocolate-chip pancakes 12 flapjacks high and keep going back for seconds and thirds, you deserve to split your pants at your sister's wedding, fatty!

—Posted by David Gianatasio