Will the groundhog live to Groundhog Day?

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Red Tettemer's annual Groundhog Day-themed Pennsylvania tourism spots are getting more violent with each passing year. First, it was On The Road with Punxsutawney Phil. Then it was the lamest duel ever. And this year, the damn campaign starts off with Phil getting hit by a car. While he's recuperating in a dark, isolated hospital room over at Groundhog Dreams, we the public can turn his probability of survival into a hilarious game of chance! We can also interpret his concussion-induced delirium with the help of noted specialist Squirrelmund Freud.

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