It’s not just old people complaining about those damn kids and their baggy pants anymore. Now it’s Official Politics. Having solved all of its other problems, the city of Dallas has begun a new ad campaign “aimed at getting residents to pull their pants up.” The campaign so far features three billboards with anti-sagging messages written in secret hipster-kid language (an example of which is, seriously, “That’s Not Hip-Hop, That’s Flip Flop”). There’s also a Web site. Maybe in a few years they’ll get around to denouncing Black Sabbath records, too. Is there really no other issue on their docket? What non-aesthetic harm does pants-sagging cause citizens of Dallas? Whatever the problem is, slogans this lame won’t fix it. In fact, they pretty much guarantee that no teenager will pay any attention, and it’s hard to argue that they should.

—Posted by David Kiefaber