The Taliban is not generally known for winning the hearts and minds of the West with its brilliant PR outreach, but Afghanistan’s top terrorist group does seem to be surprisingly up-to-date on current events—its official spokesman has a theory about Prince Harry’s recent re-deployment, and we think he may be onto something!
Britain’s best-known ginger has had something of a full plate recently, so he took a break from partying naked and “rolling on shrooms” to revisit rural Afghanistan, where so many members of the global elite choose to spend their leisure time! He’ll be piloting Apache attack helicopters during his month-long deployment, which is pretty cool (though not quite as cool as chillin’ in Vegas with resident genius Ryan Lochte and a bunch of women in various stages of undress).
Of course, the media-savvy Taliban has dismissed this move as “a propaganda stunt” designed to allow the prince to “atone for the shame” of those nude photos. Way to get ahead of the story! While we hate to agree with any statement made by a group of mass murderers, the helpless look on Harry’s face as he leaves the real world is very telling.
In yet another blatant attempt to make headlines, the Taliban also released an official statement regarding their planned response to Harry’s visit: Kill him!
We don’t know about you, dear readers, but we feel like the Taliban looks a little desperate for attention! What’s wrong guys, don’t enough people hate you already?