Hanes Thinks Twitter Wants to Know the Color of Your Panties, You Sassy Girl!

After selecting my hue from the color wheel provided on the campaign’s website, UndercoverColor.com, I am brought to a page that applauds my selection. “You’re wearing red underwear. Bold Move,” it says. “Are you brave enough to tell the world?”

I’m not so sure “brave” is the right word. It should realistically read something like: Are you vain/silly/bored enough to believe the world cares what color your panties are, and would be impressed by your oh-so-brazen and sassy over-share? Nonetheless, in the name of research, I press on.

I am then prompted to select a pre-composed tweet by clicking on tiles, each of which boasts a picture of something red, including a rose, a pair of red pumps, a melting cherry popsicle, and a tile made completely of red glitter. One of the tiles features text that reads, “Super Awkward.” Obviously, I click on that one first. It flips over to expose the corresponding pre-composed tweet, which reads, “I’ve got a scarlet secret,” which, to me, kind of sounds like the tweeter has a seriously inflamed rash. But it did say it would be awkward, so I assume the rest of the tweets must be better.

Wrong.

There are others that seem to be aiming for coquettish or scandalously flirtatious but don’t quite get there, like: “I’m not a bad girl, I’m just wearing her panties.” Ick. And, “Who needs small talk when you’re wearing red panties?” Um…hopefully most people, unless the red panties are all you’re wearing.

There’s even an attempt at feminist independence tossed into the mix, with: “It’s cute when my boyfriend thinks he can tell me what to do.” Yeah, but the joke’s on him, because I make my own big-girl decisions like tweeting the color of my panties. Independent woman over here!

All the tweets end with the campaign hashtag #undercovercolor and then a hashtag for the color itself, in this case #red.

By tweeting, participants are entered to win free Hanes underwear and an accompanying colorful accessory like a necklace. Other than that, though, there is surprisingly little brand interaction during the whole process. After sending your pre-composed tweet out into the world, you aren’t directed back into the website or given more information about Hanes or its products — the website just ends.

That’s not to say, however, that Hanes isn’t utilizing the information gleaned from participants — as AdWeek points out, the whole thing is likely an undercover market research effort to learn more about panty color preferences. In case you’re wondering, pink is currently the most popular color with 23% of responders choosing it. Blue, meanwhile, is currently trending.