It is Halloween Weekend after all, so after a long week of Fitzgerald speculation, let’s wind down the week by dressing up our favorite Plame-gate characters for Halloween.
Let’s pair the various players up with Looney Tunes characters, using the actual descriptions of various characters, as obtained from The Looney Tunes official website:
Karl Rove = Bugs Bunny
“The gregarious but truly lovable Bugs Bunny always wins, no matter who he’s battling, and no matter what the situation. No bully is too big, no hypocrite safe, no pompous adversary so powerful, that Bugs can’t joyfully whittle him down to kindling wood.”
Scooter Libby = Elmer Fudd
“He is easily influenced, even by his enemies, and is more than willing to believe anything he is told, which plays right into Bugs’s specialty.”
Judy Miller = Tweety Bird
“Tweety typically relies on allies to outwit Sylvester.” (Ahem, Keller and Sulzberger?!?”)
President Bush = Porky
“Porky is oblivious to threats from assailants only seen by his kitty, Sylvester. Porky goes on to misinterpret Sylvester’s attempts to protect him, as threats all their own… Overall, though, it’s Porky’s endearing nature and blushing naivete that add up to a guileless character whose trademark “That’s all Folks!” is as much a cultural icon as the cartoons themselves.”
Joseph Wilson = Marvin the Martian
“Marvin The Martian is a persistent ambassador from the Planet Mars. He has flown his Interplanetary Flying Saucer on missions to the moon, to the Earth, even to the mysterious Planet X. He is assigned different types of missions. Sometimes he is called upon to study the solar system. This includes Earth and the Earth creatures.
“On one mission, while collecting the Earth specimen marvin Bunny, Marvin The Martian becomes so focused on following his orders that marvin fools Marvin The Martian by telling him a wild story about his rocket hitting a Titanic-style iceberg. Too much focus can be a bad thing.”
Patrick Fitzgerald = Pepé le Pew
“Buildings clear out the moment the amorous Pepé enters. Marble statues–which have survived hundreds of years of rain and wind–melt in his presence.
“But worst of all, that stench makes the ladies run away from Pepé in horror. Love may be blind, but its ability to smell is A-OK. But luckily for our olfactory-challenged lover, he has one other abiding quality, perhaps his best: He won’t take no for an answer.
Bob Novak = Tasmanial Devil
“The carnivorous native of Tasmania has the power to devour everything and anything in a single gulp. When this furry, salivating beast comes a-runnin’, giraffes scurry for their lives, alligators turn themselves into luggage to hide, and sharks literally leap out of the water. …As with all dangerous creatures confining him can be a tricky proposition. Taz does not like being caged. He has a tendency to break free. When he escapes, watch out!…Never underestimate Taz. After tangling with Taz Bugs has learned that even Taz can surprise you sometimes. So keep a sharp eye out and keep your wits about you.”
Happy Halloween weekend everybody.