The 5 Stages of Louis C.K.’s Amazing Twitter Rant on Evolution

He quickly shows everything that is right and wrong with social media

Today's Louis C.K. rant about how life evolved in the solar system is exactly what Twitter does best, but also a reminder of the platform's flaws. If you weren’t there or if you weren't following the popular comedian, then you didn’t see it.

This is the kind of content that Twitter would love a new user to find, a world famous comedian on an epic roll of full-on insanity. That's immediate entertainment value that could convince a newcomer to stick around, an argument that Twitter has had a hard time making.

But, not only would you have to follow C.K. to see his messages, if you just saw one of his tweets, out of order, you wouldn't know what he was talking about. That's part of the confusion new users sometimes feel on the platform, uninitiated to its rhythms. It's also why Twitter has considered some forms of curated experiences for users, making sure what's popular gets to the people who would appreciate it even if they weren't online the second it was posted.

On Twitter, fragmented sentences with strange abbreviations and symbols, seemingly out of context, can be a turn off. For those steeped in the language, it's efficient and brilliant and easy to navigate, once you get the hang of it.

At the same time, C.K.'s tweets show why Twitter is so popular, because the media pick up every word and spread the message.

Below are the 5 stages of his out-of-this-world rant, strung together for Twitter's users and non-users alike.

1. Men—and women—are from Mars. Or at least they could be:

First, he said that Mars was a globally overwarmed earth once inhabitated by humanoids. He can’t prove it, he just feels it.

2. Here’s where it gets good:

The population had to flee, so they drove a Martian moon to Earth, but crashed into our fledgling planet, creating our moon from the debris (actually close to how the actual moon formed) and seeding earth with Martian DNA for future evolution.

3. The awesomely weird part:

It turns out, just like moons can sail across the solar system, he thinks we will figure out a way to ride the whole solar system to intergalactic destinations.

4. And here’s where it gets haunting:

This cosmic connection dates back to the Big Bang, you know the first thing that unites us all, where everything spewed from nothing. He calls that a source of all common human trauma and despair.

5. Oh, and he’s not high