Ad of the Day: Optimum

Stop calling Michael Bolton, and start getting a great deal on TV, phone and Internet

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You people have caused Michael Bolton no end of misery, and I just hope you're happy.

Mother's new spot for Optimum features good sport Bolton giving his dog a bath, jumping on a trampoline and rocking out in his amps-only living room while people like you—who make me sick, you're so inconsiderate—keep calling him and calling him.

The well-cast Optimum spokesperson shamefacedly explains that the company's new 866 number is just one digit different than Michael Bolton's number (please don't call him—he's had enough grief from you) and flashes both numbers up on the screen to explain the error.

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