The New York Times published an article today about a guy trying to become a hipster. This is what most people will be discussing. The article is supposed to be funny, but it’s not. However, the Times will definitely succeed in trolling the entire planet with the piece, because it’s so annoyingly awful.
That’s not why we’re writing about this. We’re covering the hipster article because the headline is “Will.i.amsubrg.” Yes, that’s a reference to the Black Eyed Peas’ idiot frontman, and dammit, that’s where we draw the line. The Times cannot do this to the American public. It can publish trend pieces that don’t make sense. It can charge $75.47 for the Sunday edition. But it cannot make readers think about the Black Eyed Peas when they’re just trying to live their goddamn lives.
Someone call Barack Obama. Or better yet, Hillary Clinton. This injustice will not stand. America is supposed to be the home of the brave, but a Black Eyed Peas pun has us cowering in fear. What if a Pitbull pun is next?