Mourning the Web

Some people want to bury Web advertising. Andreas Ramos figured why stop there?

Ramos, a cheeky Web designer from Palo Alto, Calif., says the Web itself is dead and posted an obituary on his Web site (www. “Web, age 5, of Silicon Valley. Born Aug. 9, 1995, Mountain View, Calif., and died penniless in an empty dot-com loft, abandoned by his former friends. Cause of death: lack of second-round funding.”

He then held a funeral for “Web” in his backyard—an event inspired by a round of excess pizza eating and beer drinking. “Some one said the boom is really over, so let’s bury it,” he says. (He even tried to get a funeral permit, but the cops apparently laughed at him.)

Some 5,000 mourners were invited, though only 15 showed up—mostly co-workers and friends. Still, dry eyes were few as Ramos buried a sock puppet in a Webvan delivery box.

“Web was a strange child,” Ramos said in the eulogy. “He leaped over tall buildings before he learned to walk. He went global before he got local. In the end, he just got loco. … Sock Puppet (and he was our sock puppet) was not a mere running dog of capitalist marketing pigs! No! He was a real sock! A warm sock! With a smile, and a girlfriend, and a really big, um … microphone.”