Weather Channel Promises ‘Absolutely Zero’ Election Coverage on Election Day

By Mark Joyella 

If the 2016 campaign has felt a bit like a bad storm that simply refuses to end, The Weather Channel wants to assure you relief is in sight–in fact, you don’t even have to wait for Election Day to end.

“This election night, as other networks go low, The Weather Channel goes high… to the sky that is,” the network says in a news release promising “absolutely zero” election coverage next Tuesday. “Clouds! Rainbows! Autumn Splendor! And…yes…smooth jazz! Weather will have it all in a 9-hour chill marathon guaranteed to evoke tranquility and set your soul at ease.”

Encouraging viewers to “escape the election,” The Weather Channel will counter-program the final installment of the most bizarre and contentious presidential race in years:

Starting at 3 p.m ET on November 8, the marathon will include the most beautiful, awe-inspiring, and calming weather video and scenery ever caught on tape. This world is a beautiful and magical place after all.

So go vote America and check out election results, but if you want a break from the pundits, pontifications, predictions and politics… turn to Weather.

It’s going to be huge.