Buy This Bear, Get a Beej

By Matt Van Hoven 

The headline on this post was inspired by our spy, who shared the above ad for Vermont Teddy Bear &#151 which is more than suggestive with this year’s “buy our stupid cliche teddy bear and you might earn some love points from that special lady” piece. Spy also notes, “I have a problem with watching ads, I always try to reverse engineer what the creative brief was.”

Hmm, we guess it went something like this: “We want an ad that will make men think that if they buy our product, they will get fellatio in return.”


There’s a few products that when purchased will result in blowicus jobicus &#151 and none of them includes the words “Vermont” or “Bear”. Depending on where you shop, “Teddy” is a wild card. And make sure you don’t end up going in for the beej and coming out with anything related to the state of Ohio, specifically Cleveland. That is all.

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