Agency Execs Predict How Mad Men Will End

By Patrick Coffee 

mad men image

Since it’s almost Friday and our PR contacts are very resourceful, here are some quotes from agency executives discussing the pending finale of the most/least realistic show about the ad industry.

First, what will happen to Don “Don’t Call Me Dick” Draper?


From Jorge Narváez-Arango, VP/ECD on IBM at George P. Johnson:

“The clue has always been there, foreshadowed in the opening credits. Don will spiral out of the industry and take on a new persona once again, starting a new life on the West Coast.”

Maybe, but that would mean reconciling with Megan. From Jason Marks, ECD/chief Kanye troll at Partners+Napier:

“Don Draper will kill himself. He’s been falling from his Madison Avenue tower at the beginning of every single episode… he’s got to hit the ground sometime, no?”

That would be way too easy, though. From David Eastman, former JWT North America CEO and current MCD partner:

“A twenty-something Martin Sorrell will find a loop-hole in the McCann contract that allows him to buy the 51% from McCann.

He convinces the partners to sell to him on the basis that they will make more money during his proposed 20 year earn-out than they would have done on their 5 year contracts with McCann. He funds the deal by a sale and lease back on their office space to a twenty something Donald Trump. The lease costs will go on SC&P’s P&L.”

Slow clap.

We would include more quotes about favorite scenes and episodes, but everyone picked the Kodak/Lucky Strike pitches.

CCO Mark Simon of Lowe Campbell Ewald does, however, have a recollection inspired by the lawn mower incident:

“I drove a Segway into a presentation once, crashed into a wall and ran over the Account Director’s foot. Fortunately, no toes were lost in the process.”

We assume he meant to say unfortunately. Finally, GSD&M Group Creative Director Scott Brewer talks realism:

“The fact that my sister can text me and ask how many martinis I had at lunch is a pretty good indication that [the show is] reaching an audience outside those of us in the industry, but also shows how unrealistic it is compared to the actual agency world we work in these days.”

That’s not what we hear…

Our predictions? Don will live to experience the 90s, when he will write email campaigns for a direct marketing agency based somewhere in South Florida; Roger will retire to Orlando, father a child at 70, and die in his sleep at 95; Peggy will quit the ad industry to become a real estate mogul with a practice on the Upper West Side; Pete will die while attempting to fake his own death in order to escape from Trudy; Sally will write an anonymous memoir; Bob will somehow run SCDP after the McCann deal falls through; and Harry Hamlin will break character to remind everyone that he played Perseus before they even graduated from Tisch.