Results of Awful Announcing's First-Round Matchups

By Cam Martin 

Awful Announcing is holding a tournament to determine who should replace Joe Morgan on its Mt. Rushmore of awful announcers. Morgan is being removed from the marquee because ESPN removed him from Sunday Night Baseball before this season. Here are the results of AA’s first-round pairings, which were assigned at random, followed by the second-round match-ups, which were settled on by taking the eight highest vote-getters in the first round and matching them up against the eight lowest vote-getters.

1) Skip Bayless d. Woody Paige 77.91% – 22.09%
2) Rick Reilly d. Hawk Harrelson 58.7% – 41.3%
3) Tony Siragusa d. Jack Edwards 71.55% – 28.45%
4) Thom Brennaman d. Jon Gruden 58.32% – 41.68%
5) Deion Sanders d. Mike Tirico 69.59% – 30.41%
6) Michael Irvin d. Dick Stockton 71.61% – 28.39%
7) Chris Berman d. Erik Kuselias 76.83% – 23.17%
8) Pierre McGuire d. Reggie Miller 57.62% – 42.38%
9) Craig James d. Mike Patrick 75.17% – 24.83%
10) Joe Theismann d. Mike & Mike 65.70% – 34.30%
11) Mark May d. Dave Lapham 65.07% – 34.93%
12) Jim Gray d. Jim Nantz 78.15% – 21.85%
13) Stephen A. Smith d. Stuart Scott 51.45% – 48.55%
14) John Sterling d. Matt Millen 58.69% – 41.31%
15) Joe Buck d. Chris Rose 72.53% – 27.47%
16) Colin Cowherd d. Bobby Valentine 88.47% – 11.53%

Seems like Stephen A. Smith and Stuart Scott are almost equally awful. It’s a shame that John Sterling drew Matt Millen in the first round, because Millen deserved to hang around for a while. Against a titan like Sterling, however, Millen’s awfulness pales in comparison. And really, is Tony Siragusa that much worse than Jack Edwards? We beg to differ.


Thursday – John Sterling v Skip Bayless
Thursday – Joe Buck v Deion Sanders
Friday – Chris Berman vs Mark May
Friday – Colin Cowherd v Joe Theismann
Saturday – Jim Gray vs Thom Brennaman
Saturday – Craig James vs Rick Reilly
Sunday – Michael Irvin vs Pierre McGuire
Sunday – Tony Siragusa v Stephen A Smith

We have a hunch that Joe Buck is going to be the last one standing, and will join Pam Ward, Dick Vitale and his broadcast partner Tim McCarver on the Awful Announcing logo.