Midwestern City Brilliantly Lobbys for US Soccer Game

By Noah Davis 

The people of Kansas City – well, some of them at least – want the United States men’s soccer team to play a game in their city during this summer’s Gold Cup. How best to get that information out into the wider world? A cheeky website, of course.

AOKdoesnotstop.com pretends the city is searching for a job. That job: hosting a US game. The site is complete with an About Us, Services, Portfolios, and an impassioned plea.

To Whom it may concern in the United States Soccer Federation and CONCACAF, We are contacting you in hopes that you will look over our resume and consider Kansas City for your open position as US Men’s National Team Gold Cup hosts this summer.

In this tough economy it can be hard to find work, so we are sure you have been innundated with applications. Please review our qualifications to the right before you make this important decision.

We are hungry, qualified, and willing to prove we can be the best host for our national team this summer. Kansas City put up a first-class bid in hopes of being given the honor of being a World Cup host, and for the last 10 years we have traveled all over the country in search of work wherever we can find it. We haven’t had a gig since 2001, since we helped the USA defeat Costa Rica in a World Cup Qualifier on a Wednesday night in front of 38,000 at Arrowhead Stadium.

Kansas City is ready for a major US Soccer event. We have the media, the venue, and most of all the support. Help us show the world that fans in the United States have the passion for the beautiful game. KC Forever…”

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