Joy to the Fishies in the deep blue sea

...joy to you and me. We skipped the Fishies last week (sorry) so this weekend we'll be doing a special double "Debut Fishy" issue which will be very sexy, indeed. Then we'll all rock out at a Michael's dance party. Awesome. Have a great weekend! UPDATE: Fish for thought after the jump. 1. "SAY MY NAME, BITCHES -- ANURAG KASHYAP!" This headline would be elicit a shocked giggle no matter what, but when paired with the cherubic face of the National Spelling Bee champ, it was priceless. Also, linking from Norway's Aftenposten constituted a long-overdue shout-out to our fjord-fording neighbors to the north. 2. Dang it, them shorts're ridin' high. Copy, paste. Copy, paste: Newly-crowned blogger Christopher Nelson has a sweet gig, if you like bitchin' car chases: watch "Dukes of Hazzard" reruns and blog about them - for $100,000 per year. He also gets a snazzy title, host channel Country Music Television's "Vice President for the Dukes of Hazzard Institute." Two words: doorless cars. 3. "You want the fucking abs? The tight fucking abs -- you want abs this fucking tight, you fuck?" Sure, the headline could have been "David Mamet to write for Men's Health offshoot Best Life Magazine." But that's not nearly as fucking funny as this headline from last week's New York Observer by Gabe Sherman. Gabe, we don't know about your abs but you've definitely got balls. 4. How Do The Weird Freaks Love Amy Blair? Let Us Count The Ways...Every week, The Blacktable's Amy Blair mines Craigslist for the weirdest, most unintentionally hilarious morsels. Often, they are scary. Even scarier, though, is some of the mail she gets from avid readers of her "Week In Craig" column. For her hundredth column, Blair shows us a sampling of her fan mail, which a lady would blush to retype but which at least includes a love sonnet, even though it's a tad icky. We asked her and apparently some of these people write her freakishly often. Scary people, please don't know where she lives. Amy, congrats on the milestone. 5. Once upon a time I was fallin' in love, now I'm only falling apart... The NYT's resident Ethicist Randy Cohen offers some thoughtful advice on end-of-relationship payouts, set-offs and divvy-ups: be generous. "Nobody ever looks back on his conduct in a love affair and berates himself for being too kind." Which is good, sweet advice for the heartbreaker in all of us to remember. Or, failing that, take a page from the Ben Folds Five book of loving and leaving: "Give me my money back, you bitch/ I want my money back/ And don't forget to give me back my black T-shirt." Turn around, bright eyed. 6. Jayson Blair, can you hear me? Can you feel me near you? Kudos to Gawker for its hilarious mock-up of the Tommy album cover featuring fabulist-cum-HR helpmate Jayson Blair. See, this is the kind of creativity that blogging begets. Also this. 7. Wilmer Valderrama, the Musical! The NYT lets Campbell Robertson write whatever the hell he wants. A particularly fanciful observation following last weekend's Tony Awards: "Celebrity Whose Name Can Be Most Easily Sung to the Tune of 'Gary, Indiana': WILMER VALDERRAMA. Mr. Valderrama wasn't at the Tonys, as far as we know. But it is true. Try it." We didn't bother, we're not really into the whole showtunes thing. 8. Two words: LACTIVISTS. A good cause AND a catchy name! Breast Milk, your time has come at last to shine.

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Joy to the Fishies in the deep blue sea

Rachel

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