WaPo, I don't know what to say...

Not one of the roughly 1,000 witty responses in my head compares to these choice excerpts:

“The idea of raccoons on the White House grounds give us great pause,” spokesman Bill Burton said.

Tim McDowell, a raccoon-trapper with 15 years of experience in the Washington area, says the National Park Service is probably using the wrong cages or the wrong bait.

“See, their cages probably don’t smell right,” McDowell explained. “They probably don’t have the smell of other raccoons on ’em.”

McDowell