Tiger Woods Apologizes to Everyone for Everything

Tiger Woods gave a 12 or so minute statement in Florida. He took no questions and said he was sorry. “Parents used to point me as a role model for their kids. I owe all those families a special apology, I am truly sorry.”

He also called on the press to leave his children alone.

Just to put this into perspective – Woods is still about 19,988 floozies away from being a Wilt Chamberlain.

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