THIS JUST IN: White House Forced to Consider Deporting Justin Bieber

THIS JUST IN 2To President Obama’s credit, he had a forum established for the minions of this country to have a voice.

Granted, it comes with a few catches but at least the door to get someone to hear you — someone that may actually matter (no real promise there) — is open for those motivated enough to make something happen.


Visit We the People on the White House website. Yes, it’s official but it requires a petition. And here’s the catch:

Remember you have just 30 days to get 100,000 signatures in order to get a response from the White House.

Whelp, that official proclamation now has 10-year-old girls freaking the #$%& out right about now because Justin Bieber may find Uncle Sam’s red, white and blue boot in his beliebing Canadian behind.

justin-bieberIt seems there’s a small loophole in that whole “we care what the people have to say” petition thing — some folk may actually push the federally sealed envelope. For example, if there was a source of Weltschmerz that was all up on your nerves, you could say petition Congress to remove said misgiving.

No really.

And that’s what happened with one Justin Bieber. This petition is asking Congress to “deport Justin Bieber and revoke his green card.” Remember that clause in the contract? It’s up to 135, 484 as of the time this post was scribed, and so, it’s off to President Obama for consideration.

“We would like to see the dangerous, reckless, destructive, and drug abusing, Justin Bieber deported and his green card revoked,” the petition says. “He is not only threatening the safety of our people but he is also a terrible influence on our nations youth. We the people would like to remove Justin Bieber from our society.”

Ah yes. And now, we can all quote a Bieber song — Never say never! 

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