The Fishbowl Interview With FamousDC

Say hello to FamousDC, an anonymous gossip website that covers political Washington. This is by far among my favorite FishbowlDC interviews so far because the mystery factor is high (and, well, their answers are well-written, spell checked, and grammatical.) This is a most unusual interview in that they are not readily available for interviews (at least in the traditional face-to-face sense). I haven’t personally met them and don’t know who they are. I embrace their anonymity, and have no plans to out them without permission. They indulged me in a few extra questions: How do you interview people without saying who you are? “We conduct all of our interviews from pay phones, and meet our sources in garages. We’re like Woodward & Bernstein, only with more access. We also wear bags over our heads … yes, the same one we wear on Sundays at FedEx.” Do family members know? “Yes, the ones without drinking problems do.” Do you all live in fear that you’ll be found out? I assume you work in the business in some way, shape or form. “We don’t live in fear of the Frabjous Day, but there’s an elaborate escape plan in place when it comes. Let’s just say we have already purchased one-way tickets to a foreign country and the bags are packed. We hear Prague is lovely this time of the year.” Finally, do you eat, sleep, get your hair cut, and do all the things regular people do? “We do all those things…but not in the way regular people do them. We eat like JoMa, sleep more than Mike Allen, have hair like Norah O’Donnell, play basketball like Chris Cillizza, rap like Paul Kane, and Twitter like Jake Tapper.” And now, for the rest. Enjoy!
If you were a carbonated beverage which would you be? Coca-Cola. Our formula is secret, we’re bubbly, and we go well with Jack Daniels.
How often do you Google yourself? Once in the morning to help us wake up, and once at night to help us fall asleep. Giggity.
What’s the worst thing you’ve ever said to an editor (or vice versa)? “I’m sorry, did you go to Columbia for J School? Oh, you did? Yeah, I wasn’t sure because you only mention it every five f*$%ing minutes. Well guess what, man? No one cares. We all went to a little place called FU, and graduated with honors. So take your Ivy League diploma and put it to good use by lighting it on fire and heating some poor bastard’s house in Siberia.” Best…holiday party…ever.
Who is your favorite working journalist? David Gergen. Loved his on-the-scene reporting of the discovery of fire.
Do you have a favorite word? Yes, but it’s NSFW: Drudge-bomb
Who would you rather have dinner with – First Lady Michelle Obama or Bestselling Author and former V.P. candidate Sarah Palin? The boys say: “Dinner with Michelle, breakfast with Sarah…if you know what we mean.” The girls say: “Stop being gross.” The boys say: “Can’t make us.”
What’s the name of your cell phone ring? Poker Face
When did you last cry and why? We accidentally ordered Beaches on Netflix. We thought it was a Baywatch spinoff.
What word do you routinely misspell? Paranoia.
What swear word do you use most often? John Stanton.
What word or phrase do you overuse? Natch.
What TV show do you have to watch? Glee.
Where do you shop most often for your clothes? TJ Maxx when things are good. We borrow and never return when things aren’t going well.
Who do you prefer for daytime talk, Dr. Phil, Ellen, Oprah, Tyra or the women of The View? Ellen. By far the most talented. And we’re dancers…all of us.