The 7 Worst PR Professionals in the Movies

Hollywood covers all genres, all eras and all professions. The movies on that Silver Screen usually take us to a place and time we all can appreciate. Many of them have been covered in the PRNewserverse (and you really should check them out and share with your agency for its own board room library) and have shown us how it is supposed to be done. See, for example, our favorite character from Thank You for Smoking (and S/O to the great Nick Naylor). Then again, several movies are prime examples of ways in which we wish PR was not portrayed. You know: slimy used car types, folks who would sell out their own mama for a news story hit and publicists with as much integrity as one of the Goodfellas. Unfortunately, Hollywood directors have apparently had their run-ins with some tools in this industry. Here are the 7 worst PR professionals in Hollywood. 7. Willy Wonka (Mainly Johnny Depp, Charlie & the Chocolate Factory) Let's get the main question out of the way for the young ones in the PRNewserverse: the original was FAR better because Gene Wilder was absolute greatness and he did it first, that's why! In the Depp version, Wonka's search for a progeny to inherit his confectionery legacy turns to the media for assistance. Guerrilla marketing campaigns, social media and, arguably, a satellite media tour were in the works. Who wouldn't be interested in locating a golden ticket? People were close to fighting each other for such a find. From coast to coast, sea to shining sea, everyone was rummaging through stores searching for one of the five select Wonka bars. Sales went up and profits surged, but it was a Tim Burton-inspired PR move. Meanwhile, dentists everywhere offered Wonka and Burton their eternal thanks for creating even more cavities. 6. Stu Shepard (Colin Ferrell, Phone Booth) The movie starts out with this greasy guy playing competing assignment desk editors against each other for one of his B-list celebrity clients. He lies to one while placing the other on hold, offering an exclusive to one and an embargo to the other. He's also accompanied by his staff flunkie who is supposed to be an intern, but if anyone who reads this blog treats a PR intern like that, you are welcome to never speak to any of us again. Sure, Colin is believable as a freaked-out dude caught in the crosshairs or some psycho... but PR? Hardly. OK, maybe a few neurotic entertainment publicists. Good movie. Nasty guy. 5. Ollie Trinke (Ben Affleck, Jersey Girl) Let's see, where to start? The movie itself ranks right up there with non-classics like Gigli and Daredevil. Second, if he were really in PR, his name would have been Oliver...or possibly Kirk. Anyway, he's a music publicist with a swinging lifestyle who has a kid and can't multi-task to save his life. What successful PR person do you know who can't balance two things at once, much less 15 to 20? But Ollie can't feed his kid and make a TV interview on time even when they're three hours apart. What an incompetent schlep--and who hired this dude anyway? Finally, the movie includes Affleck saying, "You're riding in the Batmobile." Super hero movie aficionados hate him for that terrible act of foreshadowing, too. 4. Eli Wurman (Al Pacino, People I Know) As a loyal Pacino fan it pains me to write this, but the movie was just not any good. Al plays a smooth public affairs guy who worked alongside Dr. King...because who is going to hate a PR guy with that on his resume? Of course, we then fast-forward to a present in which Wurman is washed-up, burned-out and smelling of more booze than a moonshine shack deep in the Ozarks. While we all fight the stereotypes, Wurman has a big-time celeb client with his own addiction issues who is eyeing a gig in civil service. (As if Congress doesn't have enough issues.) He is asked by his client to keep a girlfriend out of jail, so what does he do first? He escorts her to a sex-and-drugs den of debauchery. ...or what the rest of us real PR professionals call "Tuesday." Someone snatch this guy's APR card, please!! 3. Richard Jemmons (Billy Bob Thornton, Primary Colors) Whether you roll your eyes at this movie as an homage to Bill Clinton or not, Thornton's depiction of James Carville a tough-as-leather, southern-tinged political strategist was about as close to a stock character as you can imagine. If you haven't seen it, you should treat yourself: look past the fact that John Travolta plays the president and you will enjoy it. If you are looking for a depiction of a top-tier political mind gone the way of media relations, then you may have to rent All the President's Men. Still, Billy Bob knows how to sling mud with the accuracy and resounding fury of a Nolan Ryan: he's always in the wind-up ready to fling a hate-filled ad toward his enemies. And the spin in this movie will leave you dizzy. Sure, the guy loves his mama, but he's also the most sarcastic dude in any given room...so maybe this movie was more accurate than we thought. 2. Sidney Falco (Tony Curtis, Sweet Smell of Success) Keep in mind, this listicle is about the worst PR people in the movies and this 1957 flick is an absolute classic that still holds up. Burt Lancaster plays J.J. Hunsecker, a big-time NYC gossip columnist (dude was TMZ before those hired guns made it fashionable). The great Tony Curtis takes on the role of Sidney Falco, and he straight-up sucks. He is an unscrupulous flack who will spin it as fast as he can. If he can turn a story inside-out, his clients will swear that's how it looked when it came into this world. Mind you, Lancaster is no angel in this movie, but Curtis doesn't even know what the word "ethics" means; he even helps Hunsecker break up his own sister's romance. The movie takes on grassroots relations, big-time publicity, image management and using the bully pulpit to get your way. If this movie is screened in journalism classes across America, PR may not stand a chance. 1. Samantha Jones (Kim Cattrall, Sex and the City) This has nothing to do with sexism, ageism or misogyny on any level. Think about what you know about the TV show and the movie, and ask yourself this, "If Samantha and someone of her skill level existed in any (respected) agency in public relations, how long would it take for her to be shown the door?" If you answered more than six months, I have some lakefront property in New Mexico to sell you. Sure, people use PR as a stepping stone for several things, but booty calls? No one in the media needs to break a story that bad. What about crises? When the heat got turned up, this girl went running for ice instead of grabbing a phone to cool off the client. Trendy, urban, white, Happy Hour troll, pithy, easy--it's like the writers behind Ms. Jones wanted to cram as many stereotypes as they could into a single character. In other words, they were all SUCH Samanthas. Did we forget any farcical cinematic icons? Let us know. We are more than happy to make a second list.

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The 7 Worst PR Professionals in the Movies

If these fake flacks were the standard...

Shawn Paul Wood

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Shawn Paul Wood