Stockton Rallies Against Forbes ‘Most Miserable City’ Label

It’s that time of the year again. A glorious time when all the pretense of the American class war is stripped. When titans of industry and crooked Wall Street flacks cease their Orwellian onslaught against “greedy” teachers and public servants to allow billionaire publisher Steve Forbes to openly shit on the plight of the less fortunate without rhetorical subterfuge. Yes, it’s time for Forbes’ annual list of “America’s Most Miserable Cities.”

For the second year in a row, the city of Stockton is on top of Forbes‘ list. And they aren’t happy about it. Even though the list was published last month, the city is still worked up about the designation, which Stockton City Manager Bob Deis called “the equivalent of bayoneting the wounded.”

The LA Times sent a reporter out to talk to some unhappy Stocktonites, who are planning a citywide rally to tell Forbes what’s what.

On April 23, streets will be closed and a photographer on a crane will capture a crowd of residents wearing bright green and yellow “Stockton is miserable!” T-shirts — with the word “miserable”‘ crossed out and “magnificent!” inserted in its place. The image will be blown up to poster size, with one copy displayed at City Hall and another shipped to Forbes’ headquarters in New York.

That’ll show ’em Stockton!…Actually, it really won’t. That’s really just sad. Don’t beg for Forbes‘ validation, Stockton, because you’re never going to get it. How about publicly burning every copy of Forbes you can get your hands on, and sending a letter to Steve Forbes warning him if he ever sets foot within a two hour drive of Stockton you’re going to pay him a visit? Methinks that might get you off next year’s list a lot sooner.