Playboy to Stop Featuring Nudity

The end of nipples. The end of an era.

Slide-5-playboy-greatest-coversIf Playboy doesn’t feature naked women, is it still Playboy? The world, and Playboy subscribers, are about to find out. According to The New York Times, in what seems like an oddly important move, Playboy will no longer feature nude women.

The reason for the change is obvious: The internet. “You’re now one click away from every sex act imaginable for free,” Playboy CEO Scott Flanders told the Times. “And so it’s just passé at this juncture.”

There will still be women in Playboy, they’ll just be covered up. The Playmate of the Month feature will continue, but the photos will less retouched (the Instagram effect) and downgraded from an R to PG-13.

Tell your friend’s dad. Tell your grandpa. Starting with the March 2016 issue, there will no longer be naked women in Playboy. Perhaps they’ll add a Sudoku.