Nurse, get this lawyer another Martini! Charge it to Blockbuster.

As the DVD buisiness continues to wither on the vine, the case of Blockbuster Vs. Netflix is getting to resemble WestleMania 22.

In rather mind-numbing law-speak, Variety disects the open court fisticuffs between the onece dominatnt retailer and the net start up that is voraciously protecting it patent on renting disks through the mail.

How voracious? Glad you asked. This is what Blockbuster Attorny Marshall Grossman has to say on the matter:

“Netflix did not invent the computer, they did not invent the Internet, but they do appear to want to control it,” he said. Referring to the patent for the queue system, he said, “Netflix wants to so corner the Internet that a kid would be in jeopardy if she submitted a wish list to Santa Claus.”

Wait, you mean it’s legal for children in this country to send email to morbidly obese mythical elves? Are Republicans aware of this? Anyway, isn’t that what MySpace is for?