Newsweek Licensee Prints President Hillary Issue

Clinton wins!

Topix Media, a Newsweek licensee, has called the election early. It’s an honor to introduce to you, Madam President Hillary Clinton:

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According to The New York Post, Topix had Donald Trump and Clinton editions ready to go, but chose to print the latter first because (cross your fingers!) Americans aren’t idiots.

“The polls show Hillary Clinton with a commanding lead, and a business decision was made to print the Clinton issue first while continuing to work on the Trump issue,” Topix CEO Tony Romando told the Post.

Here’s the Trump issue:

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Of course Newsweek editors know better than to call a presidential election before it’s over, so the outlet tweeted “Two special edition covers for 2016 election outcomes were produced by a Newsweek licensee, Topix Media, and not by Newsweek. We refer all further inquiries to Topix Media.”