Never say never, but Neverland is closed – for now

Excuse me: Lions and tigers and bears?

You’re all fired.

E!
is reporting Michael Jackson‘s pleasure dome is closed, indefinitely.

“Officially, Neverland is not closed. But it’s not exactly wide open, either. Members of the Jackson family, whom Jackson presumably doesn’t need to pay or insure, have been drafted as security guards. A local veterinarian has become the savior of the zoo, adding the animals’ caretakers to his own payroll. Any Jackson-employed staffers left at the Santa Barbara County ranch are under from the state not to work until their famous boss reacquires workers’ compensation insurance.”

To us, this is to miss the point: Which Jacksons? Jermaine ? As a body guard? Tito? Oh, my Lordy. Someone should totally option this. It truly is a New Line comedy waiting to happen.