Be My Valentine?

BREAKING NEWS! Despite their antagonistic relationship, it may very well be that David Gregory and Scott McClellan are secretly in love with each other.

So suggests ex-FishbowlNY’er Rachel Sklar, who has done a clever cut and paste job of White House press briefings to craft a little love play of sorts between the two. “No words have been changed, just sorta rearranged. Also, stage directions have been added. For context.”

    (We are in a warmly-lit bedroom, neat and tidy. You could bounce a quarter off the bed. A book is on the bedside table, neatly bookmarked. SCOTT is packing a suitcase, open on the bed. His face is locked in a mask of inscrutability. He reaches over, picks up the book, hesitates for a moment, and presses it snugly into a free corner. Everything is done with precision.

    Suddenly DAVID lurches into the doorway, clutching a bottle. What little liquid remains inside sloshes noisily. SCOTT freezes for a brief moment, then returns to his packing. DAVID shifts his posture in the doorway, aggressively, and speaks in a loud, clear voice, too loud for the little room. He will not be ignored. He slurs only slightly.)

    DAVID: Scott, I just have two questions.

    SCOTT: (stoically) Well, I think that I’ve expressed my views, and we went through this yesterday.

    DAVID: But that’s a non-answer!

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