Ask Piranhamous Anything

Today we have another installment of: “Ask Piranhamous Anything.” And we do mean anything. Send your queries to This isn’t an advice column — Piranhamous doesn’t know what the hell you should do with your life any more than you do — and worse, he doesn’t care. Try to keep your questions short — we want to keep this fun, simple and insightful. 

1. Which morning shows do you watch, if any? 

Is there any morning show worth a damn? When I want some news I’ll watch MSNBC’s “Morning Joe,” but Mika’s Nancy Reagan-esque way of staring at Joe gets a little creepy after a while. Seriously, what’s up with that? However, when I know I’ll have difficulty getting out of bed, I’ll set the TV to turn on to Fox & Friends and hide the remote so I’ll have to physically get out of bed to change the channel to avoid vomiting. So the answer is I watch two morning shows but for different reasons.

2. What is your guilty pleasure website or publication to read? 

I have a couple. Rotten Tomatoes for weekend planning and Huffington Post or The Daily Caller for side-boob. I also accidentally get some news there too, but it’s really all about the slide shows of nip-slips, crotch-shots and generally human train-wreck stories.

3. The Daily Caller‘s Rose Garden interrupter Neil Munro covered a transvestite this week. The husband learned his “wife” was really born a man. From White House coverage to this. Thoughts? 

Is there really that much difference between the two these days? This guy thought he was getting one thing and he got something else, voters thought they were getting a leader and they got Barack Obama. One involves a penis, the other involves a dick; I’ll leave it to you to decide which is which.