Ask Piranhamous Anything

It’s Friday, which means it’s time for another installment of: “Ask Piranhamous Anything.” And we do mean anything. Send your queries to This isn’t an advice column — Piranhamous doesn’t know what the hell you should do with your life any more than you do — and worse, he doesn’t care. Try to keep your questions short — we want to keep this fun, simple, funny and insightful.

What do you think of what Hustler did with S.E. Cupp this week? Is Larry Flynt just a dirty, worn out, old pervert at this point?

Larry Flynt may have been dead from the waist down since 1978, but he was dead from the neck up since birth. I know the movie of his life, “The People vs Larry Flynt,” makes you think he’s some great First Amendment crusader who fought the government so we could all be perverts if we so choose. But what the movie didn’t highlight was the plaintiff in that case was not “The People” it was Jerry Falwell, so he was not fighting the government over censorship, he was fighting a preacher. Since then Flynt has been suffering for attention and fighting off bankruptcy. While he’s managed to fight off fiscal bankruptcy, creative and being relevant bankruptcy are a different story. This latest stunt is a losing attempt at the latter and a failure at the former.

What do you think ought to happen with David Shuster? Should Current TV just bring him into the fold already?

Don’t you mean “Emmy award winning broadcast journalist based in Washington, D.C.” David Shuster, as his Twitter bio says? Shuster winning an Emmy ranks right up there with Marisa Tomei winning an Oscar for My Cousin Vinnie in the annals of “Great Moments in Cheapening Once Prestigious Awards” history. His personality should fit in nicely with the band of rogues over at Current TV. Why shouldn’t he get a steady paycheck from Current before those checks start bouncing and the whole network goes under?

Do you think ABC’s Jake Tapper is the next Wolf Blitzer or the next George Stephanopoulos or neither?

No. I can’t imagine Jake Tapper embracing the beard look, so Wolf is out. As for George, Jake would have to work for a Democratic President then go into media and pretend to be an honest broker for that to happen. While Jake’s politics may be left of center, his professional integrity is not. He should have gotten the gig hosting “This Week” over George, but I think he’s too unpopular in the Obama White House for them to have ever signed off on that. So while the idea of Jake getting his own show is appealing, I’d prefer to keep him in the White House press room asking tough questions of the house’s occupant regardless of whether there’s an R or D after their name.