Was Your Agency’s Horrible Website Written by a Wanker?

The ones on this Tumblr were

What could be more creatively and intellectually invigorating than the self-promotional copy produced by ad agencies large and small? Wags might say a lobotomy. And sadly, you might feel like you've had one after visiting Agency Wank, a new Tumblr that collects "the wankiest slogans and text on ad/marketing agency websites." Marvel at the buzzwords, jargon and stupefying incoherence on display! One shop promises that "full pollination, revenue scoping and deep understanding of the market ensure that our partners get the most out of mobile." Another invites prospective clients to "Meet our senior people. All of whom report to the big boss named Idea." One exec claims to take "a Daniel Day-Lewis approach to the client-agency relationship." I picture a brand planner stalking the halls in a stove-pipe hat, reciting the Gettysburg Address from a spreadsheet. Then there's this succinctly self-aware summation of the entire business: "People aren't stupid. Ad agencies are." Tweet submissions to @AgencyWank1, not the similar @AgencyWank, which informs us that while it is "equally annoyed by the wankiness of ad agencies, this account is not the famous one you are looking for." Given the number of wankers in the business, it's not so strange that two such handles exist.