Pornhub Says Traffic Went Limp During Missile Scare, Then Surged With Relief

Pornhub, a surprising leader in data visualization, crunched its traffic in Hawaii from the day of the false alert and revealed the results today.

As one might expect—or at least hope—many users logged off the porn site after receiving the statewide alert, which said: “BALLISTIC MISSILE THREAT INBOUND TO HAWAII. SEEK IMMEDIATE SHELTER. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.”

“We can’t begin to imagine what would go through someone’s mind after reading that message,” the Pornhub team wrote on their safe-for-work Insights blog, “but based purely on the traffic numbers, it’s NOT to be watching porn.”

Here’s a chart of the site’s traffic before, during and after the false alert, as compared to a normal Saturday:

As you can see, traffic hit a low point of 77 percent below average shortly after the alert. After a follow-up alert let let residents know the warning was in error, users drifted back to Pornhub.

Of course, one of the most telling facts is that site traffic skyrocketed to 48 percent above average almost exactly an hour after the false warning. Clearly Hawaii residents were in need of relief—or just wanted to celebrate having more time on their hands.