Most Absurd Craigslist Ad Ever for a '95 Pontiac Grand Am GT

Unicorns, crowns and references to Jesus

It's become an advertising category all its own—the ludicrously over-the-top classified ad for someone's crappy used product. We had the used-wetsuit ad from England, and the used-snowblower ad from Canada. Joining this not-very-grand tradition is this used-car ad from Seattle. Placed on Craigslist by a person unknown, the ad pitches its 1995 teal Pontiac Grand Am GT as nothing less than an über-manly, heaven-sent chick magnet. "Never in your life has a car made you so appealing to the opposite sex," says the copy. "I know what you're asking yourself, 'Am I man enough to handle a car this flawless?' The short answer is no. I tried to be. I grew my beard to unreasonable lengths, trimmed my fingernails with [a] belt sander, ate nothing but lumber for 6 straight days and knocked a polar bear unconscious." OK, so it's not exactly Wieden + Kennedy caliber copy. The guy needs lessons from Weh-Ming Cho on how to script a truly good long-form classified ad. But he gets points for the crown and the unicorn. Full ad after the jump.