Maybelline’s ‘Ideal Woman Rubber Mask’ Makes All Cosmetics Obsolete

Spoof video mocks beauty standards

Maybe she's born with it. Maybe it's a horrifying latex mask.

The Onion just rolled out this spoof Maybelline ad mocking conventional standards of beauty. In it, the brand introduces a new product, the Ideal Woman Rubber Mask, a convenient replacement for the copious amounts of product that women are wont to put on their faces. Yes, it's just as creepy as it sounds.

"By simply yanking it over your face, you can instantly achieve a fresh look that conforms to Western ideals of beauty," praises the Fake-belline (I don't know, I'm trying here) director of marketing.

"It's incredible. You immediately see the difference," adds a a focus group participant. "The very first time I tried it on, my pores were minimized, my skin tone was more even, and all of the idiosyncratic little wrinkles, physical imperfections and tiny irregularities that make my face unique were erased."

As for the YouTube comments asking why all of the masks are Caucasian, I'm guessing that's kind of the point.

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Roo Powell is freelance contributor to Adweek.