If you need these, you need help

Needies, a line of stuffed animals produced by Codependent Designs, provide a fascinating glimpse into the minds of the insane. The company’s Web site calls them “interactive plush dolls inspired by codependent, high-maintenance relationships” that “compete with each other for human affection.” Attention is rewarded with songs and flattery, but if one Needie gets too much attention, the others “will conspire to take its place.” Sometimes, they even encourage their owners to neglect and abuse other Needies. How do they do this? Each Needie has an electronic nervous system, allowing it to sing, talk and feel jealousy. You know, there was a time when people sought out other people for affection and when simulating destructive relationships through toys would have been grounds for forced psychiatric care. Sadly, these are no longer the times in which we live. As a result, few words can describe how weirded out I am right now. Suffice it to say that I will never understand the appeal of being nagged by a stuffed animal.

—Posted by David Kiefaber