If Instagram had been invented in the 1980s, your digital photos would have already been pixelated messes stored on cassettes or floppy disks.
To see them, you would have had to snail-mail your camera roll to Instagram, so it could send the files back to you with awful filters applied. You could have taken pictures of your salad, your cat and your thigh gap. In other words, it'd be just like Instagram now. Except your pictures would have been called "pitchers," because apparently people in the 1980s didn't know how to pronounce "pictures."
At least, so says this mock infomercial, which earns the honor of capturing the 1980s even better than Delta's super 1980s flight-safety video. The reimagined Instagram logo might be the best part, except for maybe the fact that the whole video proves real Instagram isn't so bad after all.