Dove Launches New Chocolate by Sculpting (and Eating) Mario Lopez

Because why not?

For reasons I don't entirely comprehend, Dove Chocolate recently decided to launch its new Mint & Dark Chocolate Swirl candies by creating a larger-than-life sculpture of TV personality Mario Lopez’s torso. The minty Lopez was served at an event in Los Angeles, where people then ate pieces of Chocolate Mario in a weirdly erotic communion to the god of abs. All this was apparently meant to prove that Dove chocolate “tastes as good as it looks.” It’s a cute idea, and objectification of hunky hunks and bedimpled cuties is totally on trend. From the wet torso of Colin Firth and zesty picnics with Kraft to the battle of hunks between Diet Coke and Diet Dr Pepper, dreamy guys are popping up shirtless and sexualized all over advertising. Unfortunately, the sculpture’s bizarre minty eyebrows and creepy life-likeness are slightly off-putting, as is the notion of passing around and actually eating pieces of Mario Lopez. Maybe next time, Dove can just cover the real Lopez with chocolate bits and serve him up Nantaimori style.