Anacin Maker Working on ‘Bananacin,’ Which Might Just Keep You Alive Forever

World's oldest man approved

It may not be the fountain of youth, but it could keep you from death's door—pretty much indefinitely.

Anacin maker Insight Pharmaceuticals sprang into action this week upon hearing that the newly minted world's oldest man, Salustiano "Shorty" Sanchez-Blazquez, credited his longevity to a daily dose of six Anacin tablets and one banana. The obvious next step? Investigating whether "Bananacin," a banana-flavored Anacin tablet, might be the most powerful elixir for longevity.

"Historically, apples are the fruit most associated with staying healthy and avoiding doctors. Our scientists had never looked into the banana before," Jennifer Moyer, vp of marketing for Insight Pharmaceuticals, says in a tongue-in-cheek press release. "But now that the certified oldest man in the world credits bananas and Anacin as his life-extending combo, we're certainly going to explore whether a new Bananacin product makes sense."

They will do no such thing, of course, but you can't fault them for seizing the opportunity here. "If nothing else, Bananacin sounds delicious!" Moyer gushed. "And it only makes sense that the oldest man in the world recognizes the benefits of Anacin, which is one of the oldest brand pain relievers in the U.S."

Sanchez-Blazquez, a 112-year-old who lives in Grand Island, N.Y., outside Buffalo, was born in 1901 and is now officially recognized by the Guinness World Records as the world's oldest man—following the death of Japan's Jiroemon Kimura at age 116 in June.